I woke up at 5am with a stomach ache and it went away, I went back to sleep.  6 minutes later I woke up with the same stomach ache…6 minutes later, the same stomach ache…hmmm…it would be curious that I was having stomachaches 6 minutes apart except that I was 9 months pregnant.

I was home alone. 

I got up and started cleaning.  Isn’t that what everyone does when they’re in labor?

It is if it’s your first baby and suddenly the one thing you’ve been dying for is the one thing that terrifies you…

I cleaned the kitchen, bathroom, made my bed, repacked my hospital bag, looked at the cute baby’s room and turned on the TV. 

Then I called my mom so my dad could come pick me up.

We spent the day at her house walking around the lake at Hellyer Park and trying to get my contractions closer together.  We went to the hospital around 1 in the afternoon when my contractions were strong and 4 minutes apart.

I was only 3cm in. Great. 

We settled in for a looooooong night.  I had no idea (thank God) how long of a night.  I tried sleeping in between contractions, I tried talking to my visitors, I tried to not have to wear that oxygen mask because it made me claustrophobic and feel like I couldn’t breathe. 

I kicked my brother-in-law out of the room because he brought in Jack in the Box and it made me nauseous smelling the greasy tacos.

Finally, at 2:00am, it was time to start the home stretch.  They told me it could still be hours.

I was having none of that.

I was over it.  I had had enough.  It was time to meet this kid and go to sleep.

At 2:21 am, my daughter, Julianna Renee came into this world, all 8lb 15 ½ oz of her.  She was perfect.  And I was hungry.  She fell asleep and I finally got some soup, ate half of it and she woke up again with a dirty diaper.   And thus began the life of motherhood.

It has been hard, fun, scary, sad, exciting, hilarious, freeing, crazy and a whole array of emotions that are beyond words.

Knowing someone from the moment they take their first breath and can do nothing for themselves and watching them grow into a responsible person that tells funny jokes, is learning way more than I will ever know, loves to worship and is a talented artist and is learning to have her own deep relationship with God is an honor, a privilege and a responsibility that I don’t take lightly.

 

Thank you Julianna for changing my world and making me less selfish and more loving.  For driving me crazy and calming me down.  You are beautiful and wonderful and perfect just being who God made you to be.    I don’t know what I did to deserve being your mom, but I’m so glad that God thought we would be a good fit together.

I’m about to give you 12 rules for 12 years of life:

1.  Don’t ever let anyone pressure you to be anything other than what and who God made you to be.

2.  Every door that God opens for you, step through it even if it seems crazy – especially if it seems crazy – that’s when you’ll be happiest and go farther than you can ever imagine.

3.  Be yourself.  Who cares how everyone else is?  God didn’t make you to be them, he made you to be you.

4.  Don’t forget to be creative everyday.  God has given you great talent, don’t squander it and you will find true happiness when you have an outlet to use that gift.

5.  Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t or shouldn’t do something that you think God is telling you to do – even me and daddy.  The only person you have to answer to is yourself and God. End of story.

6.  Stay away from the bad things and choose the good things.  The more good things you put into your spirit, the more you will crave good things in your life. 

7.  Laugh.  Everyday.  All the time.  At yourself.  At life’s craziness. At circumstances beyond your control.  Laugh at it all and don’t let life own you.

8.  Sometimes you need a good cry.  Let yourself cry.  It’s ok.  Then wash your face, blow your nose, smile and move on. 

9.  When you have a choice to love and forgive or hate and hold a grudge, always love and forgive.  Unforgiveness will only hurt you and bring pain into your life.  Forgiveness is rarely about the other person, it’s about yourself.

10.  Be thankful.  When you have a bad day, when you have a bad week, when you feel grumpy, be thankful.  Remind yourself of all the good things in your life and it will change your life.

11.  Love yourself.  God made you just the way He wants you to be and not loving yourself is saying that He made some kind of mistake.  If He can love you, downfalls and all, then you need to love you, too!

12.  Don’t despise small beginnings.  In anything.  In life, in love, in work, in creativity.  Everyone starts somewhere.  Be faithful with the little you have now and God will entrust you with much.

I love you big!

I know your birthday isn’t until tomorrow, but I always tell you your birthday story today since that’s when it started…Happy Number 12!!!

 

My Baby Banana Bread
My not so baby girl
Me and my girl:)
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